I’m not okay, and neither are you, and that’s okay. The truth is, none of us are really okay. We’re all broken to some extent. However, most people hide their brokenness, afraid to be vulnerable. We go around acting as if we’re not just okay, we’re more than okay – we’re great!

It’s Okay to Not Be Okay

I am no longer that person that I was yesterday. I am not held to my past. And I am not held to a certain future. I am a new person, renewed each day (if I want), always pressing forward to obtain my true potential.

Most people don’t ever live up to their true potential. They never discover who they can become because, quite frankly, it’s a lot of hard work. It requires making right decisions and taking next steps, and not giving up when the going gets tough. It also means that when you’ve arrived, you still keep going, moving on to the next level, because when you are stagnant, you aren’t growing, and when you aren’t growing, you’re actually falling behind.

The world around us is a huge influence on who we are and who we become. If you do not have a firm foundation and plan of who you are and who you want to be, you will be tossed about like a ship without a rudder.

Who we are is often the product of our upbringing – our environment, the people we spend the most time with, and our life experiences (the good ones and the bad ones). No matter how bad of a life we’ve had, we all have the ability to rise up and overcome, but it does require determination, resilience, discipline and perseverance; most of all, it requires the desire to change. No excuses!

You may, at first, feel like you’re stuck in quicksand. You may need help to pull yourself up out of the pit.

The great news is there is help AND there is hope.

You’re not on your own. There are life lines to grab onto, if you’re willing to set aside your pride and grab hold of those reaching down to help you up. Sometimes, you have to call out for help; you must open your eyes and look around until you see the hand reaching toward you. Don’t be picky and don’t be prideful. Grab onto anyone who is willing to help because you won’t be able to do it alone. That’s not how we were designed.

Copyright Jennifer Jabbour Photography 2021

Once you’re out of the pit that had such a stronghold on you, the real work begins. You have a slippery slope of dirt and gravel that you must hike up.  It’s going to be a challenge, but it is possible.

Nothing worth doing is easy. Constant focus and forward motion is a must. If you slow down or try to stop, you’ll start to slide backwards into that pit again.

When you finally reach the top, you never have to go back down that slope again. Never look back. That is in the past, and you should only continue forward, continuing to become the person you want to be.

So who are you, and who do you want to be?

Who are you in the future? You don’t have to wait to be that person. You can decide today to be your future self.

Don’t even think about who you were or even who you are. Instead focus on who you will be and then be that person.

I’m not perfect – actually I’m far from it; there is so much about me that needs to change if I actually want to be the person God designed me to be.

Whenever I am not happy with my current situation, I take a few minutes to self-reflect on who I am at that moment, and who I want to be.

I may come up with a list like the following:

My future self:
– is loving, cheerful, giving
– is the best mom, wife, and friend
– has confidence to tackle my dreams and desires
– is a leader
– is a writer
– is happy/content
– is an adventurer
– gets things done

What Can I Do Today?
– don’t be lazy, work hard to get caught up, to get ahead, to make space to do even more
– avoid social media because it’s a time waster and a confidence killer
– write daily
– be positive, no matter the circumstance
– pray always, and especially when things get difficult
– remain calm

I recommend that you write out similar lists. Take time to figure out who you want to become and make a plan for how to become that person.

If you take little steps each day to be that person now, before you know it, you’ll be able to look back and see how far you’ve come and realize you are no longer the person you once were.

Remember, you are not here by mistake. You were created for a purpose.


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